I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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