All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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