and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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