we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Randomize
