I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
