Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
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