i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
