bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Randomize