it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
