Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
