just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
