They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
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