I must be too annoying 4 u.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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