been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
