this just has baby written all over it
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
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