At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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