I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
two words...techno handjob
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize