Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
