Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
