hotel room ftw
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
