and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
