YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
