I got chris browned last night
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
