you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
He literally asked permission to hit on me
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize