i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
