i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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