I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
