Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
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