He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Randomize