Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
third nipple confirmed
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
