Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
