All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
