i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
