You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize