Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
