New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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