There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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