glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize