Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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