god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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