I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
the condom got lost in my hair
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
