My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
