GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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