38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
