Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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