Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
