So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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