It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
