Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
