You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
